Sexy couple looking at each other touching each other in bed

How to Safely Explore Kink with Your Partner?

Are you looking to add new excitement and adventure to your sex life, then kink is a great option. Newbies can feel overwhelmed by trying the kink. Here today I’m going to discuss what kinks are, why they are so appealing, how to try them safely, and 4 fun ideas to try.

What Is a kink?

So what exactly is a kink? As Fifty Shades of Gray became more and more popular, kink became more and more popular. Influenced by Fifty Shades of Grey, many people may have an image of kink as being about dungeons, whipping, or that it’s always rough, but kink can also be a safe, enjoyable exploration and sexual experience.

The most common kink is BDSM, but it also includes spanking, rough sex, cuckoldry, role play, and more. It's possible to confuse kinks and fetishes, and although they have many similarities, kinks and fetishes are slightly different and should not be confused.

Why Are Kink so Appealing?

Perhaps it's the taboo nature of kink that makes it so attractive, since people are often attracted to things they're not allowed to do. And exploring kinks not only allows us to explore new territories, it can also add exciting adventures to our sex lives. You can also broaden your definition of sex, discover new preferences, and learn more about your own sexual preferences, etc. My suggestion is to have the courage to try it while ensuring comfort and safety. If you are interested in this, go for it!

How to Try it Safely

1. Self-education

If you are starting a new activity, it is necessary to understand its content, boundaries, and caveats. Especially in an age where information is so readily available, and there are many blogs, forums, or videos about sexual fetishes to help newbies get started.

2. Talk openly

If you're going to try kink with your partner, remember to set a safe place and time. Talk openly with your partner about this matter. If your partner is interested in it, that's great. But if your partner is not interested or is afraid, please don't force it and respect the other person's wishes. After all, sexual fetishes are not suitable for everyone, and you should not be pressured by your partner or other people. Sometimes it is good to return to simple and beautiful sex.

3. Understand each other’s boundaries and preferences

It is important to understand each other's preferences and boundaries during open discussions. You can also prepare a yes and no list in advance, which will help you understand each other's boundaries and record and save them better. When you first start exploring your sexual preferences, don’t try extreme or dangerous behaviors all at once. Take your time and start from the most acceptable step by step. In the process, you will gradually get to know your partner and their preferences for certain behaviors. 

Couple playing BDSM games on bed

4. Create a safe word

It is very important to choose a suitable safe word. Safe words can ensure that you will not be harmed or the situation will worsen during sex. So what is a suitable safe word? The necessary condition for a safe word is to be able to disrupt the current atmosphere, such as red, yellow, green, etc. As a partner, you should observe your partner's reaction in a timely manner during the process and ask your partner how they feel. If your partner shouts the safe word, stop immediately and try to calm them down.

5. Aftercare

Aftercare is one of the most important parts of kink, and the quality of aftercare will greatly affect how well your partner experiences the sexual experience. It is normal to feel vulnerable after sex, so we should provide physical and mental care to our partners afterwards. For example, you can try to hug each other after sex to comfort each other, give each other an essential oil massage, and Go take a bath together, etc. Of course, it’s also important to clean your body, sex toys, and bedding.

4 interesting ideas

Four fun ideas to try as a newbie

1. Mirror sex

Mirror sex can increase the excitement and freshness during sex. Looking at the expressions of yourself and your partner in the mirror, you can tremble unconsciously, making each other's sexual excitement reach its peak. If you are a little scared or nervous about mirror sex at the beginning, you can try it under dim lights, and then slowly progress and try different positions and angles. Of course, just choose the way you like.

2. Bondage

Bondage is something that most people can accept and be excited about. It is more important for novices to choose what kind of props. Special bondage tape is a good entry-level prop. Its advantages are that it is easy to carry, easy to operate, Wide scope of application and so on. You can start by restraining your partner's hands and feet.

3. Temperature Game

Temperature play is a great sensory exploration game in which you blindfold your partner to magnify their senses. Whether it is dripping wax or ice cubes, it can produce strong stimulation and sexual excitement. You can also choose heated or cooled sex toys, which alternate between hot and cold to stimulate your partner's senses.

4. Sex toys

You can try some new sex toys, or try some less conventional sex toys. For example, cock rings, butt plugs, dildos, etc., you can also use them in combination. Glass and stainless steel toys in particular are great for experimenting with temperature play.

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