How To Increase Sexual Intimacy With Your Partner?

How To Increase Sexual Intimacy With Your Partner?

Sexual intimacy means engaging in intimate activities with the person you are connected to. While one cannot exist without the other—sex without emotional intimacy and vice versa—sexual intimacy often involves experiencing both aspects.

Discover ways to increase sexual intimacy with your partner and yourself. Strategies may include scheduling intimate moments, communicating desires more directly, and taking time for self-pleasure. Or pick out your favorite sex toy with your partner.

How To Be More Sexually Intimate?

It's natural for couples to worry when sexual spark and intimacy fade, especially in long-term relationships. However, it's a common experience, and there are many ways to rekindle that spark.

1. Embrace Self-exploration For Fun

Sex and sexual intimacy go beyond foreplay and intercourse. Taking the time to understand your own preferences can go a long way toward building a satisfying partnership.

Embrace your pleasure journey, which isn't just about masturbation. Explore and understand your pleasure through activities like listening to pornographic audio or indulging in erotic literature.

For those who aren't sure where to start, I recommends cultivating curiosity and delving into erotica books, which can also provide inspiration for activities with your partner.

Furthermore, self-pleasure involves more than just genital touching or having an orgasm. It can involve simply connecting and feeling comfortable with your body, cultivating empowerment, and having a positive impact on your mental health.

2. Work Sex Into Your Schedule

Just as you schedule enjoyable activities like dates or gym class, consider adding sex to your calendar. I believes the idea that sex must always be spontaneous is a common belief, but scheduling can be a practical approach. While it may seem unconventional, putting it on your calendar can actually make it a priority for you.

3. Share Experiences Together

Recognize that emotional intimacy is an integral part of sexual intimacy, so it's crucial to cultivate both aspects through activities outside the bedroom.

Engage in experiences that enhance emotional intimacy. Whether it’s traveling or going to the theatre, these types of activities can help deepen connections.

Especially in long-term relationships, engaging in activities outside of your daily routine can bring novelty. Witnessing your partner master a new skill or try something different can add an element of excitement and sensuality to your relationship.

4. Explore External Courses

While it may be called "dry sex" during adolescence, diplomacy (which involves sexual activity without penetrative sex) can be a valuable way to reintroduce sexual intimacy. Additionally, intercourse can heighten sexual tension, providing you and your partner with a way to become sexually aroused without having full intercourse. 

The external curriculum is broadly defined and encourages imaginative exploration. It can also serve as an opportunity to try activities you might consider part of sexual intercourse and build trust with your partner in the process.

Sexy couple having sex on bed

5. Express Wishes In Writing

Consider incorporating written communication, such as swearing via text message. I believes it's easier to express a wish via text than out loud. Research shows that over 50% of adults sext as a fun way to connect with their partner.

Characteristics Of Sexually Intimate Individuals

Understanding the characteristics of someone you are sexually intimate with can give you insight into aspects of your life that you may want to incorporate into your life and recognize characteristics that you may already possess.

Sexually Intimate Individuals:

  1. Feel safe physically and emotionally.
  2. Feeling satisfied because a need is met.
  3. Communicate their needs and desires clearly.
  4. Sexual intimacy can be achieved without relying solely on physical movements.
  5. Feel safe in your body.

Characteristics Of A Sexually Abstinent Person:

  1. Use sex as a means to numb your emotions.
  2. Have sex while drunk.
  3. Work on maintaining boundaries and saying no to sex.
  4. Using sex as a tool of manipulation.
  5. Lack of clear, healthy boundaries.

The Benefits Of Cultivating Sexual Intimacy

Developing an intimate sexual relationship can enhance emotional intimacy between couples and provide the following benefits:

  1. Enhanced mental health: Research conducted during the COVID-19 lockdown shows that couples who are more sexually active have lower levels of anxiety and depression than couples who are less sexually active.
  1. Increase emotional intimacy: While improving sexual intimacy can bring couples closer emotionally, it's worth noting that emotional intimacy doesn't always automatically translate into sexual intimacy.
  1. Improves relationship satisfaction: A satisfying sex life helps improve overall relationship satisfaction and reduces tension between couples.
  1. Improves sleep: Having a satisfying sexual encounter can lead to better sleep. The increased release of oxytocin during orgasm promotes a calmer transition to sleep.

Possible Negative Consequences Of Reduced Sexual Intimacy

While the benefits of sexual intimacy are emphasized, it is important to be aware of the potential disadvantages associated with less sexual intimacy:

  1. Negative feelings about sex: Lack of pleasure in sexual activity can create an avoidance cycle that exacerbates the problem.
  1. Reduced immune system function: Restricted sexual activity may be related to a weakened immune system, which may increase susceptibility to colds.
  1. Vaginal atrophy: Insufficient sexual intercourse or masturbation can lead to reduced vaginal blood flow, which may lead to atrophic vaginitis. This condition may involve symptoms such as pain during intercourse, urinary tract infection, or incontinence.


If you find yourself in a relationship with reduced sexual intimacy, rest assured that you are not alone. Nearly 50% reported experiencing this, especially in long-term relationships.

Exploring the suggested techniques may prove beneficial, and if challenges persist, consider getting a medical exam for you and your partner. Underlying factors such as depression or health problems may be contributing to these difficulties, and addressing these issues can be a key step toward reconnecting with one another.

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